Dont loose yourself...

It is my keen desire to be able to stand up at age 40 and say:

Look I am successful and happy! but i havent done things the way people asked me to or thought it is typical of successful and happy people!.. i have done it my way.. good or bad .. i have not lost myself to my dreams..

everyday in this ever so dynamic world i find myself as an alien who cannot comprehend the things around him completely.. there is a wave of 'pressure' for him to do what is WARRANTED in that moment to be good in the role he is playing. but doing that would make me NOT happy as i for some reason believe its not me.. if i do it..

in such times i dont know what special strength i get.. from where i get it .. but I am able to stand up for myself and look at people, situations and sometimes even my own desires in the eye and tell them to take a hike.. i will do it my way.. and NOT land on the highway!..

i am writing all this because i am still an optimist in life.. i believe that good happens to good.. however not that bad happens to bad ppl.. rather there are things in life NO ONE deserves.. and that is where i see god as UNFAIR.. i wish that i can aleviate someone's sorrows.. but when i contemplate that it might mean increasinig mine.. I flinch.. i hope that god will give me strength in the days to come to HOPE that all the BAD that needs to happen happens to me and others are spared of it.. (that is something i hope to achieve someday) ... but all this aside as i am digressing from my main point

as i am an optimist i believe that even doing things my way and not compromising on my values i would be able to achieve my dreams (i have lofty dreams, personal or professional...)

i am hoping that i am right because otherwise the win the victory will not be worth it.. because i wont be me while celebrating it.... i will just be a typical successful man........

this note is essentially a thank you note to my parents and family for driving some values in me (how LORD knows) that make me really proud of the way I look at things... some think of it to be archaic but that is ok .. and i am proud of many such people also....

every man to himself..

i shall not change.. because i know i am something.. and also that the path I am following is the only sure shot way of keeping a comparatively blank register of regrets in life.. because as I said.. what to morrow has in store for u even today doesnt know.. so treat every moment as your last and have not regrets.. u might not have time later to even express them .. forget correcting them..